Yay!

We have a new house!!!
*happy dance*
It's a 4 bedroom bungalow on a very quiet street in a really great neighborhood in Wasaga. It's about 2000sq.ft. and the lot is freaking ginormous. 60ft wide and just under 200ft deep. The backyard is amazing! All fenced in, with some mature trees, and really private since we only have 1 neighbour on one side. There's a deck too, 12ft x 20ft. It's the perfect home for us and we are all so excited! Nick is excited to move back to Wasaga, because it is close to his dad, and he has friends there. Noah keeps asking when we get to go live in our "bigger house" lol.
We have to wait for our house to sell, but it shouldn't be long, John (our realtor) says it'll sell quick. We have a bunch of showings happening, so we're going crazy keeping this place spotless. Joe is steam cleaning the carpets as I type this, and Ains is passed out in my arms nursing..obviously the noise of the steam cleaner does not bother her. The boys are sleeping down in my moms room since we're cleaning the stairs.
I can't wait for next summer, the yard is big enough to have a couple tents set up, and of course a fire pit..so campouts with the kids! I CAN'T WAIT!
My arm is asleep and I'm on the phone so I'm gonna go..Joe and I are taking turns with the steam cleaner

Happiness

Life is wonderful at the moment. Things may be hectic with getting the house ready to sell, and we may be a little stressed out because we're a little tight on money, but life is wonderful.
I have 3 beautiful children, who I love more than anything in this world. They make it worth getting out of bed everyday..even when they are acting like total maniacs!
I have the best husband ever. He works hard to support us, and even though he's tired at the end of the work day, he's willing to help out with the household chores..hell he OFFERS to help, and insists on helping even when I tell him to relax. He does get a little bitchy when under stress..but who doesn't? I am so blessed to have a man like him :)
I am so excited to buy our new home, and to start fresh in a new place. I am wishing so hard that we can be in our new place for Christmas. I wish Kim would move to Wasaga lol, that would be perfect..I'd have my two best friends close by. It'll be like old times again with Amy, going for late night drives around the beach, going out for karaoke, taking the kids to the park at beach 5 to play *sigh* I wish next summer would hurry up and get here.
I never knew my life would be this great! It may have it's ups and downs, but everything balances out perfectly.

Bullets

• Noah woke up puking and pooping yesterday morning..t'was fun
• Ainsley got extemely ill last night and ended up going to the hospital by ambulance..she's home and feeling much better now
• I'm sick now -ugh- been throwing up but thanks to gravol I have got it under control
• I have a lot of different feelings about our wedding..I've heard some stuff over the past week that has me wondering about a lot of things. Especially inviting people in place of family members only to find out they trash talked me every chance they got. Joe is beyond pissed off about it, and I'm just hurt.
• I seriously can't wait to get the fuck out of this city, I have so many good memories of living in Wasaga, and some really great friends there who I can't wait to reconnect with. I also can't wait to start going to the Early Years Center there again, it's so much better than the one here in Barrie.
• My mom has traded her car in for a mini-van..more for our benefit lol My lease is up in another month or two, so I'll be trading our car in for something small and good on gas for my mom to use...since she pretty much got the van for us. My mom rocks.
• I think my cat is knocked up..she got out once and since then has become an escape artist..after she has the kittens (if she is indeed pregnant) we will def. be getting her fixed..we would have doneit sooner but didn't have the money for it
• I am so tired, but lately I've been having serious insomnia..a lot of things have been bothering me and I tend to lay in bed at night thinking about them..which only makes it hurt even more..but I'm strong and can get over it
• I am ending this and am going to go lay in bed and try to get some sleep..I feel like puking again so hopefully I can just sleep it off.

City Life A'int For Us...

....So we're getting the fuck out of here..hopefully in the next year!
Wasaga Beach here we come..ahhh HOME!
We can get a house there in our price range twice the size of one we could get here..we've already started looking to see what we can get.
I am so excited! HOME! I get to hang out with my Amy on a daily basis if I wanted, ahh I'm excited!
Ainsley is calling for my boobs, she's cranky due to teething, and I have Noah with a high temp and a headache so that's all I have to write
Just wanted to share the news, I'm excited. When we lived in Wasaga, I would take the kids swimming at least 5 times a week on the hot days. Nick was a little waterbaby at 2 years old..-sigh- I wish it could happen right now!

Some wedding pictures

These aren't the good pictures..but I was messing around in photoshop this evening and made a collage of some of the pictures Chris and April took with their camera:

I'm feeling too crappy to write out all the details of the wedding..but I promise I'll get around to it sometime soon...I want the good pics to go with it tho *hint Taylor hint*

Anyway..I'm off to bathe my poor sick baby and then hopefully go to sleep for the night!

Rambling

It's late, I'm tired but as usual can't sleep.
Ains and I are both sick..this is her first cold and she's also getting a tooth.
I'm feeling really down lately, I don't know what it is, but I need to work through it before i go into full blown depression mode again. -sigh-
The wedding was great (aside from Joe's parents and grandparents missing the ceremony) but the weekend sucked.
Things just went to shit..ugh ains is up so I have to cut this short

I'm married

I'm married..the wedding was great..except for Joe's parents and grandparents missing the ceremony because they got lost. That sucked big time.
It was a long day, and I love my friends!
Taylor took like a bajillionb pictures, and I am so thankful for her for doing that! She's good with a camera so I know my wedding pictures are going to rock.
Amy is also an awesome friend! And Jen, and Kim, and yea I'm half saslepp and a little buzzed frmo the champagne and hpt jacuzzi. You can probably tell i've given up on corecting my tyupos, i'm so freaking tired
I think i am going to go cuddle my HUSBAND! lol feels weird to say that
i'll post pics tomorrow

2 days

And I will no longer be Melissa Stagavs
Weird
I'm going to have to pratice signing my new name! Hehe, I get a new identity
Jen and her daughter Marilyn will be here tomorrow afternoon! Ahh! I'm so happy they are going to be here for the wedding!
Ahhh! My house is a disorganized mess, must.clean.it.spotless.before.company.arrives.
We have like a million people coming here for the BBQ after the wedding. It's gonna be crazy!
So tired, been cleaning like a mad woman, but stll have a lot to do in the morning.
bedtime now. By the time I post again I'll be married!

Pissed

Joe and I have been arguing all freaking day long about the wedding..he's pissed off because I invited my friends before some of his family members decided on wether they were coming or not. Well what the fuck? Was I supposed to just sit and wait, and then find out they weren't coming and invite friends who live over three hours away with only a couple days notice?
I am pissed off with his mom. She knows we have a limit of how many people we can have at the ceremony, and we get home from a horribly long day out at the mall to a message on the answering machine from her saying "Oh, Aunt Sandra and her husband are coming too"
-head explodes-
She didn't even ASK if it was ok, she was informing us that they are coming. Uncle Tim and Aunt Patty said that if we went over our limit for the ceremony that they had no problem with just coming over here afterwards..but I'd rather them be there than Aunt Sandra who we NEVER see or hear from. Joe got mad at me when I got mad at the fact that his mom dodn't even ask, even though she knows that we were already close to our limit (actually we are 2 people over it, but Pamela knows and is fine with it).
I'm so frustrated with Joe..he's been in such a pissy mood today and I'm sick of him bitching about stupid shit. I was supposed to go over to Taylor's house this afternoon, but we ended up running late getting out to the mall, and then after the mall, Joe bitched about how it was already after 5 and how he wanted to go home and eat beofre he went to pick up the boys, and I reminded him that I had told Taylor I would come over and he just snapped out on me. I told him BEFORE we even went to the mall that I wanted to go ver to Taylor's after shopping, and he was fine with it, but then afterwards he acted as if I never told him and was a complete asshole.
So now I feel like an asshole, because she waited around for me today.
I hope he calls his mom in the morning and tells her Aunt Sandra can't come..I'm sorry but I'd rather have the family there that we are somewhat close with, than the ones who we never see.
-sigh-
I just can't get over the fact that his mom didn't even ask..I know he has a huge family and all, but I'm not going to tell my BEST FRIENDS they can't come because some family members who we never see or hear from suddenly have an interest in our lives.
Ugh, I'm so worn out from everything today. I just needed to vent
tomorrow will be a better day...I hope

-sigh-

I'm going to say first of all that I am extremely happy and excited about the wedding..I can't sleep because I can't wait to get my dress tomorrow (today now because it's after midnight).
I'm still feeling down. There's nothing in particular that is causing me to feel this way, but lately I just feel sad. I start crying randomly, and I just feel so BLAH
I need to stop letting myself get into these lows..I'm starting to isolate myself again, and I feel horrible for it. Taylor has invited me to do a million things, and I always decline...why? Because I'm stupid I guess..I dunno, I get into a low and I isolate myself from everyone. -shrugs- I'm worried about not fitting in, saying something stupid, etc. Social anxiety much?
I want to be involved in so many things, but I have this huge fear of saying/doing something wrong and looking like an idiot.
I feel like I just don't fit in anywhere, so I don't even bother trying.
Crying again..wtf is wrong with me..I just wish I could be fucking normal!

OMFG!

OMFG! I'm so excited now! My great aunt sent my mom a cheque for 2 g's and mom is buying me my dream dress! She's also renting us a room for Sunday night..hellooooo jacuzzi room!
Ahhh! We are going to buy my dress Saturday morning, I can't wait!
God, this started out as a simple wedding, and now it's turning into the wedding of my dreams.
My dad is going to be there, he called me today to tell me..
I have a whole to-do list for tomorrow:

• Book the hotel room
• call the dress shop to make an appointment
• call and book hair appointment
• email Pamela and let her know we have decided on the cermony and vows and all that
• pick up marriage license tomorrow morning (i know we haven't gotten it yet!)

Also this weekend, we have to get the boys some dressy clothes, Ainsley a dress, and Joe some dress shoes.

I'm so excited!

Wedding plans...12 days!

Wow, 12 days until we're married! Spur of the moment is how we roll yo!
We went and payed our deposit for the minister, and it turns out she performs weddings at her house included in her fee. It's a beautiful victorian house, with a huge gorgeous garden..perfect for an outdoor wedding..and if it rains (God forbid) they have a huge beautiful room inside where we can have the ceremony.
We went and got our rings tonight..they are plain white gold bands, $300 for both of them, and the woman didn't charge taxes on them either.
Tomorrow morning we get the marriage license, and after that all we have to do is decide on our vows, and the ceremony, reading etc. Mom is buying me a dress, so we're going out this weekend to get it. She is also buying me a bouquet..God I'm so excited..it's turning out to be way better than I imagined. We're not having a reception, but we are going to have a bbq here afterwards. Details details..so many details lol.
Joe's parents will be here for it, and hopefully my dad can be here too...I called him today to tell him hahaha, he said he'll try his best to get that weekend off of work, or at least be back in Ontario for the day even..he was in Texas this afternoon.
I'm soo freaking tired, so I'm going to bed. I had 2 smokes today..bad bad bad but it's a start!

Exciting!

I had a great long weekend! Joe decided Saturday afternoon when he got home from work that we were going to go stay in a hotel up north somewhere for a night. We decided on Huntsville so we could rive through Algonquin Park and visit with Grandma and Grandpa for awhile Sunday afternoon.

It's the last long weekend of the summer and we're trying to find a room in cottage country..we called at leaset 20 different hotels before finding a room that wasn't retardedly expensive. It was just Joe, Ainsley, and I since the boys were at their dad's house until Sunday, and my mom had plans with them for the day Sunday (they went for a ride on a steam train and then went out to dinner in Toronto). The trip was fun, Ains slept the whole way to Huntsville, and the hotel was right by Arrowhead Provincial Park where we camped in 2005.

The room was nice..small but really nice. The wireless internet kept cutting in and out so we ended up just watching tv and relaxing. Woke up early Sunday morning and hung out until check out time..Joe was being silly posing for the camera.

We drove through Algonquin Provincial Park, in hopes of seeing another moose..but no luck, too much traffic for the moose to be out. Oh well the scenery was breathtaking as usual, and we ended up stopping to buy the kids each a t-shirt.

We got to Grandma and Grandpa's house around 2pm, and stayed to visit for a couple of hours..lol Grandpa forgot that Joe is his grandson and introduced him as his nephew lol..Grandpa was also generous with his beer, and somehow talked me into having 3 lol..fun times. Ainsley decided that she was sick of the car halfway home, and I ended up in the backseat entertaining her with an empty water bottle and by making her Stuffed Giraffe dance to Eminem's "Without Me" heh..I should get that on video..that Giraffe sure can bust a move.

We spent this afternoon at the beach with all three kids, my mom, Taylor and George and their boys and George's family (briefly lol) Amy, Vilo, and their 2. Fun times! After the beach, Amy, Vilo, mom, Joe, and I (and the kids too of course) went to the Beacon for dinner, and then went back to Amy's house where the kids went toally crazy! lol Amy got a million pics that I will post whenever I get them from her.

Nick starts Grade 2 tomorrow..and Noah officially starts J/K next Tuesday! AHHH! MY BABIES! They're growing up on me!

I have some big news..lol Joe and I are (hopefully as long as everything works out) getting married Sunday September 16th..lol Spur of the moment yes, but that is so like us.

I'm going to bed, I'm edgy because I haven't smoked in 4 hours and this stupid nicorette inhaler thingy is not working as well as the patch does...but I am determined to quit for good this time..ugh Ainsley is awake, so I have to end this now..hope everyone had a great long weekend!

Pictures..a lot of pictures

I put the pictures I took with Taylor's camera onto a cd so I can finally post them..some are out of order, but I can't be bothered to put them into order.
Enjoy:

At the zoo..wrapping Ainsley in Olaf


Taylor took a bunch of Ainsley when I got her hair up into a ponytail


Another zoo pic


Close-up of Miss Squishy


-sigh- I love her


Daddy's girl


Noah in the wagon at the zoo


Nick playing around at Taylor's house after the zoo


Ainsley wrapped in an Indio Didy


The men changing the babies at the zoo lol


I took a picture of a tree!


Joe takes a paci better than AInsley does!


Hanging out in the bumbo chair at the park at the beach


A smile!


Thunder thighs!


The water was so warm, and you have to walk out soo far to get past ankle deep


Splash splash splash


She loved the water




"lets go daddy!"














My FAVE picture!










Too bad I was standing in the wrong light




Joe is such a great daddy



The end finally

Intro [eta]

Ok then! Now that I have my blog all fixed up..
Hey! So I'm new here. I've been writing on another site for 6 years, but I am sick of the high school mentality a lot of people there have..so I've moved here.
A little info about me:
My parents are divorced (since I was 15), my mom lives with me, and my dad is a truck driver (he sold cars for 12 years). I have a younger brother named Jody, who works with my soon-to-be husband Joe.
I have 2 boys who I had with my ex Bryan, their names are Nick and Noah. Nick is 7 and is starting Grade 2 next week, and Noah will be 4 on Nov. 30th and is starting J/K next week.
I left my ex in 2004 because he was abusive, I ended up spending that Christmas in a shelter. I then went on to collect welfare and ended up moving in with a friend of mine, who had a best friend who rented from Joe. Joe and I met in person once, and then found each other online a couple months later, in May 2005. It was love at first sight (well second sight lol)
My boys and I moved into his house with him, and this past March we welcomed our daughter Ainsley into the world.
I breastfeed Ainsley, and plan to do so until she wants to stop. She loves being worn by both Joe and I, and we have also shared our bed with her since she was born. I love being a mom, and I can't wait until we conceive again! Next timeI get my home birth!
My first 2 years living here in Barrie were pretty lonely. I didn't know any other moms who shared the same interests and parenting style as myself, but that changed this past July when a friend I met online moved here to Barrie as well. I have a best friend here in Barrie, and I love hanging out with her and her 2 boys. It's an added bonus that Joe and her husband get along as well.
I'm a fairly easy going person, but I sometimes have a quick temper. I love photography, and music..I am a great singer (in the shower lol), and I love to read.
Anyway, that's enough about me, I've rambled on enough.

Mel